Tactical Patterns In Controlling Relationships: One-sided power games
I personally like this research on tactical patterns used to control relationships. I find it thorough. I found it insightful of what I have been through. Although, I have been counseling/coaching previously and have heard much stories about it; I still experienced it myself.
Often, I think, we rationalize much for our partner's behavior and we end up failing to see the pattern.
This is the first of 16 patterns of tactics mentioned in the power and control wheel by By Clare Murphy PhD (Posted in: Intimate partner abuse, Male perpetrators, Why does he do it).
Often, I think, we rationalize much for our partner's behavior and we end up failing to see the pattern.
 |
| Power and Control Wheel |
This is the first of 16 patterns of tactics mentioned in the power and control wheel by By Clare Murphy PhD (Posted in: Intimate partner abuse, Male perpetrators, Why does he do it).
Research with men and women reveals those men who engage in one-sided power games show more concern about gaining something for themselves than showing concern for what they are actually doing to their partners. In other words – what matters to him is not what he does, but the benefits he gains. There are multiple one-sided power games played by a person determined to maintain power and control. If one tactic does not work, he will merely change to a new tactic.
Some examples of one-sided power games where: He makes the rules, he makes all the big decisions and he has the last word.
The men want to be the Ruler of the castle. HIS WANTS ARE MOST IMPORTANT – HE DOES MOST OF THE RECEIVING. So, these men continue to ensure that all the attention centers on themselves. By wearing the mask of the Master, he monopolizes the woman’s time and energy. He has his own selfish way at her expense. When a man believes he’s superior, she is not allowed to contradict him. He determines how, when and what things get communicated. His previous knowledge makes him right and her wrong.
One-sided power games DON'T always entail physical violence for the man to ascend to the superior gender status and get the rewards society tells him he deserves. It DOESN'T take physical violence for him to ensure she descends into a downward despairing spiral and a position of servitude.
Some examples of one-sided power games where: He makes the rules, he makes all the big decisions and he has the last word.
The men want to be the Ruler of the castle. HIS WANTS ARE MOST IMPORTANT – HE DOES MOST OF THE RECEIVING. So, these men continue to ensure that all the attention centers on themselves. By wearing the mask of the Master, he monopolizes the woman’s time and energy. He has his own selfish way at her expense. When a man believes he’s superior, she is not allowed to contradict him. He determines how, when and what things get communicated. His previous knowledge makes him right and her wrong.
One-sided power games DON'T always entail physical violence for the man to ascend to the superior gender status and get the rewards society tells him he deserves. It DOESN'T take physical violence for him to ensure she descends into a downward despairing spiral and a position of servitude.
Comments
Post a Comment